do or do not, there is no try

Blog #10

While Yo Yo Ma may believe that STEAM is the best way to give our youth a proper education, I disagree. There are many complications that may surface when trying to change a curriculum. Many schools have to completely adjust the way they tech entirely, between changing teachers, choosing which subjects are mandatory, and supplying the kids with the proper tools to lean. Honestly, art is not something pressing enough that all these troubles need to be addressed. Art is also something that is subjectively useful, whereas you can’t say for sure that it will help every student. Art is a subject that many people are naturally inclined to, so implementing it as mandatory would be unfair to those who aren’t artistically strong. Not to mention art is a subject that requires much more funding than schools can afford due to the supplies needed. Honestly STEM is an effective way to teach children and doesn’t need to be changed.

1 Comment

  1. jcrocker5

    Overall your paragraph is pretty good. Your ideas and thoughts are clearly stated and well organized. However, you did not really argue against any of Yo-Yo Ma’s ideas. I would consider choosing an argument that he makes and quote it specifically, then refute it. You mentioned him at the beginning of your paragraph and then did not mention him for the rest of the paragraph. I think your argument would have been stronger if you had presented your ideas as the introduction sentence and then mention Yo-Yo Ma later in the paragraph as you refute his ideas. Overall, I like how you presented your ideas and your writing.

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